In my previous blog post I started to discuss with you the impact of the curse of knowledge when it comes to learning a second language and choosing the right instructor.
The curse of knowledge (quick review here) refers to the phenomenon for which people who know a lot about something tend to forget (or simply ignore) what it’s like not to know. The more knowledge, the lesser the ability to communicate with those who struggle to understand.
This means that native speakers (at least most of the time) are going to have a hard time “lowering” their Spanish to your level.
I always teach my lessons in Spanish. But the way I talk to a beginner differs from the way I talk to an advanced student. And the way I talk to an advanced student differs from the way I talk to my friends when we are drinking at the bar. We use a lot of slang and jokes that only someone raised in Spain would understand. And, yes, a little bit of swearing here and there (sorry, Spaniards swear a lot!).
I know how to raise and lower my Spanish the way you lower and raise the volume of your TV with your remote. But I am a teacher and I spend most of my life talking to students. So I know very well what to say to favor communication with the non native. Do not expect that from the other Spanish speakers out there.
If you (non native speaker) talked to my dad, he would immediately act as if you were deaf. He would place a hand on your shoulder, get very close to your ear and start speaking to you very (very) loud and slowly while nodding his head after each sentence. My dad believes that if you speak Spanish slow and loud enough even a cow will be able to understand. Well of course! If tiny children can speak Spanish, how hard can it be?
The funny thing is that he will still choose the most obscure expressions and idioms. He will skip and shorten words. He will tell you Spanish jokes that not even a Mexican would understand. He, in short, will talk to you the way he talks to his buddies at the local cafe where he plays cards and drinks coffee every day. But ve - ry - slow - ly and LOUD!
Every time I introduce him to a non native speaker he does the same. It is embarrassing!
But this is the thing:
First you will understand your teacher. Then, at some point, you will understand the newscaster with her proper Spanish on TV. Finally, one day, you will understand my dad and the other 450 million speakers out there. Each, speaking in their own unique and crazy way. The language is beautiful and incredibly rich. But beauty and richness come with a price tag.
One day you will understand most people no matter their accent and local idiosyncrasy. But one thing is for sure. It will not happen from the comfort of your sofa or watching Narcos on Netflix. Sooner or later you will have to put yourself out there.
Recently I was telling a student how lost in translation I felt when I moved to London. And that was after years of taking English lessons and passing all the official exams which certified me as a fluent speaker. I was still lost. And some people thought that I was deaf. And would speak to me ve - ry - slow - ly and LOUD with their crazy cockney accent (I was living in East London).
But after some weeks I started to understand more and more. And you will too. When you are ready and the time comes.
Last piece of advice: when you speak to native speakers, don’t try to be a hero. Don’t be afraid to ask them to speak slowly and repeat things. Remind them you are still learning and be very grateful for their time and patience with you. Understand that their Spanish will not be exactly like the one in the textbook and that they will not have an easy time making things easier for you. But hey…
You can do this!